With the new JETs currently settling into life in Japan, I can now officially call myself someone’s senpai. Which means, I’ll be asked to constantly share life advice and my old experiences with the new comers at every opportunity that we meet. The question that I receive the most from people is, “What’s the hardest part about living in Japan?”
I’ll admit it was a little bit of a tough question for me. I don’t really have any dietary restrictions so eating the food isn’t really all that bad. Learning the language isn’t as tough as everyone makes it seem. I’ve never really had a problem adjusting culturally to living abroad, especially since I’ve already been here once before. I think my biggest adjustment being here is battling loneliness.
Everyone experiences loneliness at some point in their lives, but I think living abroad adds another degree to that sad feeling. No matter how long you’ve lived abroad, culture shock will still inevitably catch up to you. You’ll yearn for the familiarity of your home country. Even if you make good friends in your host country, sometimes the language barrier still prevents proper communication. Other reasons for loneliness are not so obvious sometimes. Your friends all have jobs or are in school. They get married and have children, or move away.
I don’t think people talk enough about loneliness when going abroad. Many people when they talk about loneliness they intrinsically think it’s their fault for feeling this way. Maybe they’re just not interesting enough or you don’t feel comfortable enough speaking another language. Especially if you’re already battling mental disorders such as depression and anxiety, living abroad can be tough. Loneliness tends to make you fall back into your own bubble of seclusion. While you might feel better for a while, eventually you start to feel worse and then the cycle continues.
Are There Any Solutions?
The only thing I can recommend as someone who’s goes through it from time to time is just to reach out to people. Reach out to your family and friends from home and your friends in your new country. A simple phone call or text can really make your day. Don’t let language stop you from making new friends in your host country. Most relationships I have here started out with very little verbal communication. Try and integrate into the community as much as possible club activities, hobbies, etc. just to keep yourself busy as much as possible.
If your biggest dream is to live abroad for a while, go and do it. It’ll be full of some of the greatest experiences you’ll ever have. There are plenty of days when I struggle with loneliness, but I would never give up this experience for anything else in the world.
How about you my fellow readers? Do you struggle with feeling lonely while abroad? What are some things you’ve tried doing to battle that?